Ballack shared another joke with fellow comedian Jens Lehmann...

A funny German walks into a bar...

Stereotypes - lazy clichés about a country or race usually committed by people who should probably know better. Like us. But can you blame us when Michael Ballack seems to follow them as a lifestyle choice? Take his response to Arsene Wenger's post-match protestations, done so in a manner that could only make the rest of us say "By gum old chap, that man there be a Gerry, do shoot him at once." Albeit, if it was 1940.

Wenger did indeed make a bit of a berk of himself when he claimed that despite losing 2-0 Arsenal had "70 per cent possession of the ball", "were not running after the ball", and that Chelsea didn't give a "demonstration of football".

But the way Ballack responded today was brilliantly ruthless, clinical and damn sure correct (see: German): "When he loses he always finds an excuse. Football is not possession on the ball or playing nice passes. Good football is winning games and that’s what we do when we play against them," he harrumphed in a manner that cuts a fine line between trying to be amicable but comes over as more than a little patronising. And he probably doesn't shave his armpits either.

However, unlike the common misconception about Germans, it's a well known fact that Herr. Ballack is a damn fine teller of jokes, and we've managed to get our hands on five of them...

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband is in hospital.

A man walks into a pub.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.

Why do undertakers wear ties?
Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
One.

"Take my mother in law."
"Certainly, to the Post Office?"

Michael Ballack - coming to a Comedy Store near you...