The future?

ToePoke's Mike Ashley correspondent (we can't afford David Craig), Gary Ramm, unleashes his unbridled vitriol...

OK, so the headline is a shameless pun on a brilliant Doves track, but it also aptly describes the man in charge of Newcastle United.

Since he turned up at St James' Park in 2007, he has systematically reduced the club to rubble, a  gibbering, pathetic wreck of an outfit who only six years ago beat Juventus, Kiev and Leverkusen and drew in the San Siro in the Champions League. He has removed the heart of the club, and left in its place a selection of freebies, loanees and kids.

No matter what you think of NUFC (and I'm sure you all have an opinion of your own), it is difficult to argue against the fact that Mike Ashley has made a complete and utter cock-up of every single decision he has made. Appointing Keegan, appointing Wise, pissing Keegan off, appointing Joe FucKinnear, leaving Hughton in charge, appointing Shearer (and claiming it as his greatest decision, then leaving him to rot) - the list goes on. It is difficult to think of a single positive since he came riding into town. Staggeringly, he has even made Freddie Shepherd look like a saint.

His latest brainwave, however, goes beyond incompetancy and is deliberately antagonistic. On the day he took the club off the market (again), appointed Chris Hughton as manager - despite his obvious flaws as a manager - he smuggled a small, but very damning, sentence into his statement. "The Club aims to maximise its commercial revenues; this includes renegotiating its Club sponsor and kit deal, which expire at the end of this season, as well as welcoming offers for the stadium naming rights for next season."

This begs the question - who would want to buy naming rights to SJP? No one would ever call it by its new name, for a kick off. But also, why, if Ashley was prepared to do it, would he advertise the fact on the official website? Surely he would simply announce it once the deal was complete? By making the fans aware of it before it happens, he is simply trying to wind up the fans even further than they already are. He has taken a proud club and reduced it to it's knees. He's selling the club's history down the river.

In the same month where it has been announced that Newcastle Brown Ale will no longer be brewed on Tyneside, and in a city which is becoming more and more cosmopolitan and losing its sense of identity, St James' Park acts as a reminder of what being a Geordie is all about. It sits on the top of the hill, like a beacon, a cathedral, a dominating sight for away fans heading into Newcastle. Meddling with something which means so much to so many, which has so many memories for people of all ages, is at best misguided, and at worst deliberately rabble-rousing.

I'm no advocate of violence, but Mike Ashley will not be safe walking the streets of Newcastle if his latest plan goes ahead.

"We need to make The Greggs' Steak Bake Arena a fortress"

Gary Ramm is editor of brilliant Newcastle blog shiteseats.co.uk