Revealed: The reason behind the swine flu outbreak at Backburn

After Blackburn got, to use the technical term, absolutely pumped by Chelsea at the weekend, most observers deduced that Blackburn were just being their usual, really average selves. But alas, it seems that there was another reason they were  God-awful. Some of the players were suffering from swine flu, a disease that could, potentially, cause the end of civilisation as we know it. (Perhaps not such a bad thing if it means we don't have to sit through Blackburn games any more).

Here at ToePoke, we decided to do some investigative work to try and find out what caused such an outbreak among the players. It would also give us the opportunity to insert some pig-related puns. We were sure there must be a ration-al explanation.

Blackburn, as you know, is in the middle of nowhere and the training pitch is located directly next to a farm. On Friday, Benni McCarthy was challenged by the boss to prove that he could, in fact, hit a barn door. But, over- anxious to prove Mr potato-head wrong, Benni got a tad excited and missed said barn door, sending the ball high over a shed. His ball was returned to him a few minutes later but we can exclusively reveal what happened to that ball during those intervening, lost minutes.

Case solved.

Apologies for the sound quality, there is a lot of crackling on the tape.

(Don't forget to tip your waitress, we will be here all week)