Shabba Ranks...in last place.

But do it at the right time, You can be slow or fast...

But you must get to the line
They'll always hit you and hurt you
Defend and attack
Theres only one way to beat them
Get round the back
Catch me if you can
Cos' I'm the England man
And what you're looking at
Is the master plan

Who'd have thought it eh? Turns out that's not as inspirational a teamtalk as you might've thought.

We won't even get started on Jason McAteer's words of wisdom...