Revealed: The reason behind the swine flu outbreak at Backburn

After Blackburn got, to use the technical term, absolutely pumped by Chelsea at the weekend, most observers deduced that Blackburn were just being their usual, really average selves. But alas, it seems that there was another reason they were  God-awful. [More]

Former Rangers Chairman (aka Over-Lord) David Murray once famously said: "For every fiver Celtic spend, we will spend a tenner." It seems that this 'business model' was perhaps not given the full consideration it merited. While it did have the desired effect of 'getting it right up' their rivals from the east of the city, it wasn't exactly a template for running a successful business. [More]

Win the album and check out the new video, Mr Nice

The Chemists have been confirmed as special guests of the recently reformed Brit - Rockers Skunk Anansie on their forthcoming European tour.   This will coincide with the release of The Chemists debut album “Theories of Dr Lovelock, which is released on November 2nd, through Distiller Records. We have album copies to be won!

Just a 'funny movement..'

Van the er, man, clears up diving accusations once and for all...

Arsenal's horse-faced, non-scoring striker, Robin Van Persie, has again insisted that he does not dive. Dutchman Robin(his parents must have been regular visitors to Amsterdam cafes if they think that is a good handle to give your son) has categorically stated that he is not a diver. [More]

A diving Didier Dogba...(sorry)

Only scumbags dive. So we invited our resident footballing simulator, Stephen Roberts, to tell us why shits like him do it...

Diving. Not the Tom “I’m 15 and my mother still makes me wear Speedos” Daley variety. More rather the scourge of football sort. There’s nothing that boils my piss more than the sight of a 15st striker who ends up face down in the muck after the slightest of nudges from a pursuing defender, a la Drogba. In fact it’s not just strikers.
[More]

Who knew that Ray Winstone moonlights as an Old Trafford steward?

It's Fergie's magical, mystery additional time board...

Because we'll never get bored of mocking the raging, slurring, Scottish red man...

(Thanks for the email)

Welcome to League Two...

Just what is going on in Sol Campbell's head?

"Hi is that Nottingham taxis? Yeah, as soon as possible please. Meadow Lane. Er, anywhere..."

And with those final words did Sol Campbell end his short stay at Nottingham Travelodge. So what was all that about?
[More]

To blooding youngsters and failing to entertain crowds we can now add winning money to the many uses of the Carling Cup...

Yeah we know, the League Cup these days is a teeny bit shit. But hey, it's definitely better than the opening group games in the Champions League, and since we had a punt on that, we're going to have a go tonight. So without further ado, here are tonight's bets...
[More]

Oan ma heid son!

Stevie Mac, our Scottish correspondent, gives us his views on all things Scotland. Well, all things football related and perhaps the occasional review of re-runs of Taggart.

Last week the European Champions League and the all-new Europa League kicked off in earnest.  While most of the British media’s focus was on English teams, Scotland’s two representatives, as usual, slipped somewhat under the radar. [More]

Someone's just sent us this video, and the first thing we noticed was Ray Von from Phoenix Nights is playing the part of Rafa Benitez.

Which is a match made in heaven if ever we've heard one.... [More]